baby steps

baby steps

my sister and i are very close. we talk almost every day, and every once in a while have marathon conversations hashing out our deep-seated childhood issues, our ideas about relationships, religion, child rearing and often, haircuts.

my sister has a love/hate relationship with her hair. each time she ventures out to her inevitably new hairstylist, it’s cause for a major discussion. curly? straight? bangs? layers? short? long? the laundry list of considerations is fairly extensive and frankly, exhausting. now, this may sound like an insignificant topic, but trust me this is a major issue we’ve been working through for years.

so over the weekend, i mentioned that i had my hair cut, and was very happy with the results. she remarked dejectedly that she wished that she could have that with her hair.

so i launched into an in-depth analysis about how i’d been with my stylist for almost two years, and that it wasn’t always that good. as a matter of fact in the beginning of our relationship, i asked him to cut off all my shoulder-length, blonde hair and color it brown. which was a pretty daunting place to start a relationship.

from there it was a careful process of getting the color and the cut right as it grew out. inevitably it was too ashy, too light, not natural enough…i was frustrated and almost left him several times, but i knew he was talented and gave a great cut so i stuck with him. and over time he and i finally got to place where he knew what i liked, and we started having some fun with it.

as i related this story, in an effort to get suz to stop switching stylists every visit, inevitably getting caught cheating on one stylist with another and having to hide behind the counter (which is, strangely enough, a woman’s worst fear in a salon) she should really consider trying to develop a relationship over time with one good stylist with potential.

then i paused for a minute grinned widely and asked, “now how is it that i can manage to develop a healthy relationship with my stylist, but am completely unable to manage this in my relationships?”

she replied, “baby steps.”

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